Collected by Imam Al-Bukhari Abu Abdullah Muhammad bin Ismail
With commentary based on the checking, editing, rulings, and comments of:
Imam Muhammad Naasiruddeen al-Albaanee
Shaykh Husayn ‘Awdah al-‘Awaayisha
Shaykh Sameer bin Ameen az-Zuhayree
Dr. Muhammad Luqman as-Salafee
On Kind Words to Parents
1. Taysala bin Mayyas said:
“I was with the Najadites (Khawarij, the followers of Najdah ibn ‘Amir) when I committed wrong actions which I supposed to be major sins. I mentioned that to Ibn ‘Umar. He inquired,
‘What are they?’
I said, ‘Such and such.’
He stated, ‘These are not major sins. There are nine major sins and they are:
Associating things with Allah;
desertion from the army when it is advancing;
slandering a chaste woman;
consuming an orphan’s property;
heresy in the (sacred) Mosque (of Makkah);
scoffing (at Muslims);
and causing one’s parents to weep through disobedience.’
Ibn ‘Umar then said to me, ‘Do you fear the Fire?’ Do you want to enter Paradise?’
I said, ‘By Allah, yes.’
He asked, ‘Are your parents still alive?’
I replied, ‘My mother is.’
He said, ‘By Allah, if you speak kindly to hear and feed her, then you will definitely enter Paradise as long as you avoid the major sins.’” (Authentic)
(1) This hadeeth highlights the importance of keeping the company of the people of Sunnah and referring to the scholars to understand the true position regarding any matter in the religion. Perhaps Taysala, was influenced by the Najadites to believe wrongly that the sin he committed was a major one.
(2) We also learn from this hadeeth that sins are not entirely of the same category; some are major while others are considered minor with respect to the major ones and not by way of trivializing sin.
(3) One of the meanings of the expression, يَسْتَسْخِرُ is to burden people and to make them do a job without pay. Some of the scholars even consider it the most preponderant meaning here for its been mentioned after usury and consumption of an orphan’s wealth both of which are illegitimate means to seek wealth.
(4) The permissibility of swearing without being asked to swear while giving a religious verdict or admonition is pointed to in the narration.
(5) As long as one abstains from the major sins, speaking kindly to parents and feeding them is surely a means to attain admission to Paradise by Allah’s Leave.
2. ‘Urwa commented on the verse,
وَٱخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ ٱلذُّلِّ مِنَ ٱلرَّحْمَةِ… ٢٤
“Lower the wing of humility to them out of mercy.” (al-Isra 17:24)
(It means): “Do not refuse them anything they love.” (Authentic Chain)
The exemption to this is when their desire involves disobedience to Allah, the Mighty and Exalted; for the religion prohibits disobedience to a creature in disobedience to the Creator.